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gerretIs that a swash in your buckle?

by Gerret, file under: My Creative Side

Gerret Vision

I'm telling you, The Gerret has been working like a dog. I tried explaining to Stump and Tweet when I first got here that I was NOT a working breed kind of dog. I tried to let them know that as a result of many generations of selective breeding and a brief affair my great-great-grandmother had with some fox from the low country, I am much more genetically predisposed in the direction of a devil-may-care swashbuckler sort of breed -- fearless, romantic and adventurous with a predilection for fast car rides, roughhouse dog parks and rewards-based training using high-value treats.

Yes, The Gerret loves to swash and the The Gerret loves to buckle. But their comprehension is SOOO limited. They tell me "Don't pull on the leash, Gerret." And I'm like, Huh? What? Did I hear you right? "Don't pull on the leash?" Well "Don't pull on the leash" my butt. If you had half a brain you'd know that YOU'RE the ones who aren't supposed to be pulling on the leash. I mean if you're going to strap yourself to The Gerret, you're making an iron-clad commitment to getting some serious exercise. But they just stare at me blankly.

I read a story on the Internet about a dog who had a human with a vocabulary of over 100 words. I think it's apocryphal, or a parlor trick at best. As a species they just haven't been domesticated long enough. All day I'm trying to communicate "dangerous," "exotic" and "juicy red meat" and their response is "sit," "stay" and "have another bowl of this dry-ass kibble." Sigh.

What evah.

So anyway, sooner or later I got to talk about work or I don't get fed. So here goes. I've been working on this new series called "For Dogs on a Budget." The premise is that even if a dog can't afford all the fancy toys and chews they sell on the Internet, he can still manage to have a decent life with a little creativity. Not as good a life as dogs who can afford all the fancy toys and chews they sell on the Internet, but hey, we can't all have blogs that generate thousands of paypals in advertising revenue.

My first how-to video in this series is called, "For Dogs on a Budget: How to Turn a Food Bowl Into a Dog Toy." Enjoy.

I kinda liked that food bowl. I think it's worth about two-and-a-half Gerrets. More if it starts out full of food.

Food bowl as toy: 2.5 Gerrets


This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on June 5, 2008 11:17 PM.

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